-
0:52 Family Guy - Pick Up My Poop -
9:16 Backstabbing bosses and callous co-workers
by chota
How can I become an asshole in five easy steps?
Introduction
Have you ever thought that deep down you really were not a nice person?If no, this guide probably is not for you.
If yes, congratulations, you're well on your way to becoming an Asshole!
If you follow these easy steps, you will be able to ensure that people think of you as an asshole, and not as a mere jerk, putz, loser or boor.Featured Videos
The Simpsons - Donut Hell
Homer sells his soul to the devil for a donut and is sent to the ironic punishment
1...Step One: Have Impossibly Refined Sensibilities
This is the most essential step to becoming an asshole, and probably the most difficult.
It requires an amount of study because you will need to know your field.
Faking is not an option;a fake will be held up as an object of scorn and as a pretentious moron, which is clearly not your objective.
I'd suggest specializing in a particular area, like food or music.While General Assholery is spectacularly impressive, it requires nearly a lifetime of study to properly attain.date a engineer at thermotron-- smile
Knowing your field means knowing it utterly; if you intend on being a Food Asshole, you'll not need to be able to instantly tell the difference between a good Chateau Lafaurie-Peyraguey and an indifferent Puligny-Montrachet, you'll need to be able to expound to your host or hostess on why the former would have been a much better choice to serve with dessert.
2....Step Two: Use Really Big Words
This is a much simpler step in your ascendance to Divine Asshole. All you'll need for this is a thesaurus and a dictionary.
Take some common place words and replace them with obscure ones, instead of "beauty" say "pulchritude", instead of "childish" say puerile.
Make certain that you are properly using your new obscure words; loudly correct anyone who uses them improperly.
3....Step Three: Choose Something To Hate
It doesn't matter what, as long as it is something almost universally loved. Don't hate the French if you're English.
Don't hate the Backstreet Boys or N'Sync, or you may be mistaken for a wit instead of an asshole. Whatever you do decide to hate, make sure you know enough about it to hate it properly, I'd suggest hating something in your field of expertise.
If you're a Food Asshole, hate Italian Cuisine, if you're a Music Asshole, try hating Mozart or The Beatles. Make sure that whatever you do hate, is common enough to come up in casual conversation; if you're an Art Asshole, don't hate Gustave Caillebotte, as it's hard to bring conversation repeatedly around to lesser-known impressionists.
Step Four: Always Manage To Turn Conversation Around To You
No matter what the topic of conversation is about, make sure you play a starring role in it. If someone is complaining about their hateful and psychotic ex-boyfriend, tell them all about your evil ex, who was way more evil and psychotic then theirs. If you don't have an ex, make one up.
If someone manages to mention something remotely related to your field of expertise, monopolize the conversation. If possible, turn the conversation back to the thing you chose to hate in Step Three and complain loudly about it.
Step Five: You Are Always Right, Be Secure In This
This is the culmination of your training as an asshole. Once you have mastered the first four steps, you are ready for this.
When someone decides to argue with you about the merits of the thing you hate in step 3, intellectually bludgeon them using the words you learned in step two.
This should not be especially difficult if the hated item is one in your area of expertise from step one. Resort to ad hominem attacks deriding your opponent's intelligence.
Don't be overly concerned about being clever, witty or eloquent; you are an asshole afterall, not a bitch. If you manage to win the argument either by logic and reason or by your opponent leaving in disgust; be an ungracious winner and taunt your fallen foe.
Conclusion
If you carefully adhere to the above steps, you will be a Supreme Asshole in no time.
While you may not have many friends,
you can be secure in the knowledge that being an asshole is always better than being a jerk or a loser;
they not only lack friends, they lack style.
-
3:45 Politically Correct Seattle (Almost Live)by Tiffany
Thursday, October 31, 2013
thermotron training with fred plont--Funniest Leadership Speech ever! pick up my poop
thermotron now i'm an engineer GED required--Career Opportunities
Jim Carrey Ice Ice Baby
Jim Carrey Ice Ice Baby www.BarflyDance.com.
"White, White, Baby" - Vanilla Ice Parody from In Living Color
By far the best Jim Carey parody from In Living Color! This shows why he became a star and Wayans brothers gave him his start.Career Opportunities
| Position | Department | City | State |
Apply By |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Field Service Engineer/ HVAC/ Technician Nashville, TN | Field Service | Nashville | Tennessee | |
| Manufacturing Support / Production/HVAC Focus | Production | Holland | Michigan | |
| Manufacturing Support- Mechanical Assembly focus | Production | Holland | Michigan | |
| Field Service Technician HVAC/Refrigeration Houston, TX | Field Service | Houston | Texas | |
| Field Service Engineer / HVAC/ Technician CT | Field Service | New Haven | Connecticut | |
| Controller / Accounting Manager | Accounting | Holland | Michigan | |
| Field Sales Capital Equipment / Atlanta | Sales and Marketing | Atlanta | Georgia | |
| Field Sales/Capital Equipment Sales/ Reading UK | Sales and Marketing | Reading / Oxfordshire | ||
| Field Service Engineer / HVAC/ Refrigeration/Technician Detroit MI | Field Service | Detroit | Michigan |
thermotron insane clown possee join our cult the holland michigan church of thermotron
nsane Clown Posse - Miracles
Insane Clown Posse music video Miracles from their smash album Bang Pow Boom. Get the album here ...- HD
-
Insane Clown Posse - Night of the Chainsaw
Insane Clown Posse's latest music video Night of the Chainsaw from The Mighty Death Pop!- HD
-
Insane Clown Posse Watch "Call Me Maybe" - ICP Theater
Subscribe to the Fuse YouTube channel: http://bit.ly/fuseSub Click here to see all the episodes of ICP Theater: ...- HD
thermotron management training with daniel j okeefe -- super duper former employee
yes the king really dosen't have any clothes on
You don't crown a guy king and then the king doesn't have any clothes on and you say, 'Hey, he's still the king.' ...
Pppp
COPYRITE-5-84
Peter F. Drucker in his book "The Effective Executive"
" It is the duty of the executive director to remove ruthlessly any one especially a manager who constantly or consistently fails to perform with high distinction.
To let such a man stay on corrupts the others..
.Indeed I have never seen anyone in a job for which he was inadequate who was not slowly being destroyed by the pressure and the strain,
(like strain on the brain) and who did not secretly pray for deliverance. "
ed [ unless the director is a spineless liar and thief, and embezzler ]
(yes the king really dosen't have any clothes on!!)
Here comes the king in his latest clothes!
Doesn't he look a treat! ....
I can't wait to wear my clothes, and then we'll have some fun! Narrator 1 ...
Thermotron--- DON'T BLOW IT.... field service technician- plont your ass here
DON'T BLOW IT.... field service technician
If it bleeds, we can kill it.
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Smokers Blow Away Antioxidants That Protect Against Heart Disease
Smokers Blow Away Antioxidants That Protect Against Heart Disease New York (MedscapeWire) May 16 — Cigarette smoking is hard on the arteries, according to ...
News, Medscape Medical News, May 2000
Hiccups - Emergency Medicine
The term hiccup derives from the sound of the event. Hiccough erroneously implies an association with respiratory reflexes. The medical term, singultus, is ...
eMedicine Clinical Reference, Updated Continually
What we face may look insurmountable. But I learned something from all those years of training and competing. I learned something from all those sets and reps when I didn't think I could lift another ounce of weight. What I learned is that we are always stronger than we know.
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)